Bleh with Barry

Random with a cynical twist of lime.

101 Things to Fear–Number 101: Zombie Penguins

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So, I’ve decided that over the next few months…weeks….a year…however long it takes I am going to do a constant set of posts that deal with the things the people should be fearing in the world. Now, I know it may seem a little weird or whatnot, but I think that all of you might enjoy! So, here’s the first of 101 posts about things that people should fear because terror does exist every where we look.

#101–Zombie Penguins. Now, I know what you’re thinking. This is a very illogical thing entirely. What self-respecting  zombie attacks a penguin? Well to be honest with you, I don’t know exactly. The only thing about it is that if the zombies are working on a special operations unit, Zombie Penguins would fall into this category. So, let us know the face of the enemy.

 

*They have water fairing capabilities which make them especially handy because the majority of zombies cannot swim. However, these little beasts can make it in the water and be a sneak attack on any unsuspecting orcas.k

*Penguins are cute, and people like them. From afar, the zombie penguin is capable of imitating the living penguin. Thereby, it can lure people to it so that it might attack and infect them very quickly without too much of a fight.

*Moreover, the zombie penguin is a master of blending in with the tuxedoed crowd which makes them especially deadly at black tie events. Here, they can attack the elite, movie stars, politicians, etc. With our most powerful individuals under the thrall of the zombie horde, what are we to do?

Conversely, the zombie penguin is a very distinctive creature and cannot run very quickly…so, without it being in the water or having its camouflaging abilities, it’s actually a pretty small threat to the general populace.

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Written by barryr22

February 19, 2011 at 9:30 pm

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