Bleh with Barry

Random with a cynical twist of lime.

Posts Tagged ‘paradise lost

Do I Destroy Good Things?

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“Evil, be thou my good.”

                                –Paradise Lost by John Milton

A line from Milton’s masterpiece Paradise Lost is a fitting way to begin this post. Recently, I’ve come to the conclusion that I am a corrupter of things. Not that this is necessarily a bad thing; however, I feel like I am a powerful influence on people in general. Why? It might be because I’m charismatic, charming, friendly, warm person. I would like to think that I’m likable which might be why I feel like the Pied Piper leading people after me in my ways.

Not don’t get me wrong. I don’t think that I’m a completely bad person (probably should work on a better epigraph to begin my blog posts to try to convey this). I just feel like I could be better sometimes. I’m cynical, judgmental, crude, and many more things. I just don’t know where I was meant to fit in the grand scheme of things. Maybe, I’m supposed to be this way….

A couple of years ago, I was called “Conniving and manipulative” by a friend. At the time, I thought that she was just being a bitch. Yet, as time has passed, I don’t know what to say to her accusation. I am a little conniving and manipulative, but I would like to think that this is in a good way. I am a person who always plans (hence the conniving part). I am constantly making plans because one must always be prepared…and when you’re prepared, you have backup plans…and backup plans for the backup plans….just in case.  Planning is one of the things that makes me feel like I have some sort of control over the crazy world that I live in… As to the charge of being manipulative, I guess I can be at times. However, what human being isn’t? Seriously, think of the last time you were manipulated or that you manipulated someone. Was it within the last day? week? month? Again, it’s just one of those things…I don’t think that I’m anymore manipulative than anyone else out there. So, there you go.

Do I destroy good things? It is possible…I’m not denying that I can be a very influential person. If people choose to pick up my cynical and snippy air, what can I do? Am I to blame for such things?

Written by uncannynerdyguy

October 31, 2010 at 2:45 am

Summer Reading

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With school finally drawing to a close, I begin to look to days of less things to do which means that I’ll have time to read. I love reading…it comes with the territory of being an English Professor I suppose. However, I have so many books on my “to read” list that I’m having a hard time fathoming what to read first.

1) I have thought of rereading all my treasure Anne Rice books. I love all the vampire books (some a little more than others but that’s splitting hairs), and every time I read them, I learn something new or become more aware of certain characters. These novels are also something that I’m contemplating writing my Master’s thesis over…so, I feel like it might be viable to go back and reread now instead of waiting.

2)The Lord of the Rings Trilogy by Tolkien. As a fan of fantasy fiction, many people are shocked to find out that I haven’t read all three of the books all the way through. This fact does not mean that I haven’t read a great deal of them; I just haven’t read all of them. I am greatly in love with the movies (as I have watched them to have something to grade papers with this semester). I want to see where they came from, and I know that the books will be better than the movies. It’s pretty much an unwritten fact that the book will be better than the movie hands down.

3) A plethora of other books that I have around that have been collecting dust.
Atonement by Ian McEwan (again loved the movie)
Paradise Lost by Milton (interested in the mythology of the fall of Satan that he presents)
The Hero with a Thousand Faces by Joseph Campbell (being a large proponent of mythology, I have only read pieces of this book…however, since it may play a great part in the creation of my Master’s thesis, I feel like it is worth the read…also, I know that I will enjoy it)

And these are just a few of the books that I have to decide from…I also usually read Bram Stoker’s Dracula about every other summer…so, this book is back in the cycle of things too…Really, I just need to be able to absorb information by osmosis…that would be wonderful…but until then, I am going to have to think about it. Any suggestions people out there. I’m even open to others that might not necessarily be on my “list”.

Spark of Humanity

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Spark of Humanity

A swirl of lighted fire

And eternal damnation.

A scorching of skin

And a pecking of flesh.

A loss of all,

A gain of more,

A paradise lost,

But I will make my own.

A hand of hubris,

An undeserved peace,

The shell of a pagan god,

But I do exist.

A wanderer of earth,

A crippled wretch,

A diamond turned to dust;

Yet, I still have time.

A tormented spirit,

A rage against the light,

A life of uselessness;

However, I will be a god, again.

Written by uncannynerdyguy

February 18, 2010 at 11:52 pm